PC Culture Is Killing Lazy, Hack-Ass Comedy!

I’m seeing it everywhere I look; good men like Bill Crosby and Louis CK are losing work because the snowflakes of the PC PD got their feelings hurt! You think they don’t need that work?! Do you have any idea what if feels like to go from being a multi-millionaire to just a millionaire? I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy, which is obviously Nancy Pelosi.

Nancy Pelosi Clap

No more Rape Jokes…

Comedians can’t even say the word “rape” anymore. Do you know what that means? It means comedians who used to be able to get laughs from shock value now have to have some other kind of value.

Writing jokes is super hard, you guys! To write a joke, you have to have a premise, a structure, an element of surprise or misdirection, a punchline that adds to the original premise somehow, blah blah blah. Look at how long it took me just to explain it, much less actually do it!

It used to be you could just say “rape” and get a really tense, uncomfortable laugh right off the bat. Boom! Done! Who cares why they’re laughing! A laugh is a laugh, right? Now we have to come up with actual jokes. I don’t know about you, but I did NOT get into comedy to sit around writing comedy all day!

The big question is WHY is this happening to so many innocent men who are just trying to save some time? Is it the obvious reason that, while most men have never been raped and never worry about it, it’s a real threat that women deal with every day, and maybe empathy is most important for things you’ve never experienced and literally can’t imagine what it’s like?

NO! It’s because men are LOSING THE COUNTRY!! First, you can’t joke about rape, pretty soon you won’t even be able to commit rape! I’m sorry, I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA!

This is the USA

Don’t give up. take Action today.

But now is the time for ACTION! I wouldn’t be complaining if I didn’t have a solution. To all the comics who have ever bombed or aren’t getting booked because their edgy material doesn’t work anymore, here’s what you gotta do: Quit comedy! THAT will show them!

If comedy doesn’t appreciate shock over substance anymore, screw ’em! Find any other job and be awesome at that because YOU’RE TOO GOOD FOR COMEDY!

And, if you agree with what I am telling you, and you missed all the sarcasm in an article that was 100% sarcasm, go get sterilized. If you bring the golf cleats, I’ll do it for free.

Alpha Bitch OUT!

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